Shame lies to us about our identity 1. what we think of our self and 2. how we view our self. It makes us want to hide who we are. It takes away our voice. Be someone else. Not try, take chances, or try new things. It keeps us second guessing our self. We usually engage in negative self-talk. We often spend a lot of energy trying to not be shamed again by someone and proving our worth to others and our self.
We may think we are driven by fear or worry or anger, but if we glance behind those fears, worries, and anger, we may find shame fueling these emotions. We may be afraid of making mistakes or doing the wrong thing because as a child we were shamed for not doing what adults expected of us. And now we are just protecting our self by not stepping out to do that new thing. We may say we are afraid, but often behind that fear is past experiences where we experienced shame.
Dealing with shame and getting free of shame will help us be braver, stronger, less worried people.
Go deeper, read Shame: Recognize It, Heal from It, Walk in Freedom, post 10.
